Struggle to Give the Dead Voting Rights

S.W.L Smithton
Gondor Daily Star-Telegram
Year 2759 of the Third Age

The dead are people too. Just because they live under Dwimorberg Mountain, doesn’t mean they don’t read the news too! An under-represented minority in this year’s political campaign is none other than the dead.
In the past, they went back on their word; will they do it again on Election Day? The reason the dead are still sentient is that they said they would fight at the side of King Isildur and then later fled to the hills. They were cursed, and when they died, their souls could not rest. What better to do while they are not resting besides update themselves on the current political climate in Minas Tirith. As they are still hanging around Dwimorberg Mountain waiting for something or someone to free them from their restless curse, they sit and wait for anyone who dares cross through the Paths of the Dead. No one who enters the Paths of the Dead have returned, included several of our political pollsters.
Some people think these old soldiers are stuck in the past, but I think they represent the rich history and tradition of Gondor. They may be from ages past, but they know the richness of the Gondor of which we want to return. They know the right way back to the Minas Tirith of old, because they have seen the decline of our region over the thousands of years that they have been in exile. They swore allegiance to Gondor, and the least they could do is contribute to the political process of Gondor.
It is time that the political process includes these men and registers them to vote. Now if we could only figure out how to get them in for Election Day without killing every man, woman and child in the city.